Thank you for taking the time to respond to my piece. This piece isn’t written for those who are left. It’s written for those who are in relationships that do not make them happy but that do not have anything overtly wrong with them. And I would never encourage someone to stay in a relationship just because ending it would be unspeakably devastating for the person who doesn’t want the relationship to end. In my opinion, not leaving a relationship that doesn’t serve you because the other person will be devastated is not a valid reason. I did that for years. And would have kept doing it if I didn’t have the courage to advocate for myself, for what I wanted from my life.

I stayed in my relationship years longer than I wanted to because my ex husband was a kind man and I didn’t want to hurt him. And it almost destroyed me. My mother did the same thing with my father — and as children, my brothers and I knew she was deeply unhappy. It impacted on levels we are still unpacking today.

Relationships are never simple or easy. They require energy, effort, attention, sacrifice, compromise, blood, sweat, tears — and if you are not happy in your relationship, why on earth would you continue to give all of that to it? Life is short — be happy. But life is also long — don’t be miserable.

Good luck in your journey.